Monday, July 2, 2012

Retrospection

"Understanding the past is key to changing the future."

If I could manipulate time as I pleased, then rather than see the future from the past, I would prefer to look upon the past and present with the understanding that I will gain in the future.  It is wisdom that I crave, wisdom and understanding that helps one to make the best choices possible.

At times in my life, I have had some measure of understanding that others did not; this, however, was balanced by my total lack of understanding in other important areas.  Why is it that I can give better advice to other people than I can give to myself?  It's like I'm farsighted: the closer it gets to me, the less clear it becomes.  Yet, when time passes, I can look back and know exactly what I should have done.

This is as frustrating as leaving a test only to remember the answers to the problems you missed.  Somewhere in my head, the answer exists; never-the-less, I cannot bring it to the forefront until it is too late.  The worst part is knowing that I already have the answer, but being unable to use what I have learned when I need it most.  Is there some discipline that I must learn, perhaps a pair of glasses that can correct my vision?

On a separate topic, though perhaps not wholly unrelated, my mind seems to be far ahead of my ability.  In my writing, the story is written in my mind - why can't I get it onto the page?  I know exactly what I want to draw, but my fingers will not cooperate.  The music I've designed is beautiful, but my ineptitude at performance makes it difficult to share with the world.  I should probably learn to write the music down on paper, but I'm afraid I cannot even do that right now. 

What do I need to practice to calm my mind and apply what I know about others to my own situations?

I must think on this.

Edit:

I just went over some old emails from when I was 14, and to my abject horror I made the same mistakes then as I did during college.  Same song different verse.  I shall now go hang my head in shame for not learning the first time.

1 comment:

  1. Our bodies are limited, but our minds are not. The hard part is getting our finite abilities to catch up to our infinite ideas.

    You have an amazing mind - truly one of a kind. It is my hope that I can help you execute all of your unique ideas. It's what I'm here for.

    ReplyDelete